Think of the last networking event you went to. Chances are, you brought a few business cards with you and probably handed a couple of them out.
You likely received a bunch, too. And there were more than a few people handing them out indiscriminately like pamphlets on the street.
Chances are you accepted the cards, looked at them, and stuffed them in your pocket.
It’s the polite thing to do. It’s part of the script. It’s what everyone does.
And when you went home – or back to the office – they looked like names on paper. Strangers in your pocket.
Did you make any real connections? Did you get in someone’s phone, or did you get stuffed in their pocket?
Kill me in the comments: Tell me I’m wrong. That I don’t understand networking. That I’m missing a major facet of lead generation.
That may be true.
But, I do know that I’m not going home with strangers. To me, it’s not a numbers game, it’s about starting real relationships.
And most real relationships don’t start with forced formality. They start with a real connection.
And if we make real connections, we don’t end up as strangers in each others pockets.
We might even end up as friends.
[image: jaaron]
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
You’ll have a hard time getting people to stop using business cards, but I do see your point. Look at the name “business card,” it doesn’t exactly scream friendliness!
I so resemble this post… Or the ‘don’t’ aspect, at least. It’s hell, especially in the era of FB “friends”, to truly connect with new people without being too invasive, but I have scads of biz cards I’ve collected legitimately, through conversation, or as you say, politeness, and never followed up. Making a face-to-face connection you can use to frame your follow-up contact seems essential, and while making a judgment about who’s going to be ‘useful’ now and in future is a crap shoot, it would seem to set the stage for the kind of LinkedIn/FB connection request that may ultimately transcend the biz card.
What should one do to avoid the formality? Reject the cards altogether? Hold the person there until they’ve given you one detail more compelling than their elevator speech? bill’s point is well taken, though I wonder if “personal” and “friendly” are synonymous? I think Andrew is saying that they aren’t necessarily, which is an interesting nuance.
Again, this is why Facebook is such a conundrum in my mind…
Andrew, you don’t understand networking. Kidding.
But you do raise a good point. Business cards can be very helpful to those of us who have difficult names to spell. Or great face recognition but horrible name recall. But I’m not sure that the networking events created just to trade business cards are meaningful if you aren’t actually having meaningful conversations and making meaningful connections.
@bill: You’re right. They aren’t going anywhere for a while, but I do think we should think about them differently. If we had a $5 bill attached to each one, would we be so quick to hand them out? I think it’d slow us down and that’d be good.
@M.C.: I guess my litmus test for interacting in public is if I feel comfortable enough to give someone my “personal” cell phone number, or “personal” email address, then they’ve made it in: we’ve connected. If I just hand them my business card, that’s no different than telling them to look me up on LinkedIn and try to get in through formal methods. If we’ve connected, you’ll laugh when I hand you a business card. Because, if we’ve truly connected, why would I need it?
@B.M. You know what, I never thought about the “difficult names to spell” angle; I’m guessing the “M” in your name is pretty tough to spell
But truly, I feel like there is probably a place for business cards, but treating them like brochures is not that place. If we’re in a hurry, or we forgot to exchange numbers, it’s probably a pretty good solution. But if I’ve talked to you for 25 minutes at an event, I can probably spend 30 of those seconds asking you what follows the “M,” and you’ll tell me as I type it into my phone.
But what if this is your business card? It might force people to connect with you through because of your undeniable awesomeness: http://www.joystiq.com/2010/06/17/seen-e3-the-best-business-card-ever/
@Cagey B: Touché.
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